Musings of a Daydreaming Wanderer

Yes, the whole of today has been wasted by my parents who “forced” me and my brother to go on a one day shop-and-eat-all-you-can trip to Muar. We were “kicked” out of our beds at 0545, and crossed the Second Link to the first stop for breakfast at Ayer Hitam. After that, we proceeded to Batu Pahat for lunch and Muar for teabreak, and finally made a U-turn back to Selang for dinner before crossing back to Singapore. Its a very boring and uneventful trip (Coffeeshop, temple, shopping centrerestraunt , temple, biscuit shop, hotel restraunt), and travelling for nearly half the day on a coach hurts the butt alot, along with glimpses of kampong-style houses, and rows and rows of banana and palm trees.

However, the only positive outcome of the trip is probably the experience at BP Ocean Restraunt. I saw this attractive (17? 18? 19?-year-old) girl in a purple 旗袍 (mid-cut at the legs, probably due to “rules & regulations” in Malaysia) serving the tour group (actually it was more of my table, from what I’ve noticed), and that got me thinking of the Malaysian Chinese living there. With probably a wage that’s half of mine, and (most probably) living in a kampong-style house (which supposedly costs 9K SGD for the land and house, with a 15-metre tall antenna to recieve MediaCorp broadcasts from Singapore), living in Malaysia must be pretty bad (I can tell from her tone of voice in servicing us), due to the country’s affirmative actions, even though they mostly make up the middle and upper income people there. You started a fire in me, Miss, and moved my heart. I hope I’ll be able to make you happy, someday, somehow, somewhere in the future. I’ll remember your plight. I’ll remember your suffering. I’ll remember your sadness. I’ll remember…you.

With the clearance forms signed, items dekitted, stores returned, certificates collected, well-wishes accepted and handshakes shaken, I am now officially an NSman of the RSAF. However, its a half-happy and half-sad event for me, I guess. Knowing that you have been through tough and good times with other guys of your own age, and disbanding our little band of brothers makes me feel uneasy about the future of each of us. Will we see each other again? What interesting things will your platoonmates do? The world suddenly seems like an intimidating and scary place, compared to the sheltered confines of a camp and seeing familiar faces everyday. It’s as if I were an uncivilized barbarian who left his home in the polar north of Faerun and headed down south to the temperate lands where civilized people and claustrophobic cities are found. What happened over the past 26 months of military service now seems like an old film playing in Technicolor. The greens of the grass and trees, the browns of the soil and sand, and the blacks of the roads and waterlogged grass now all seem to lose their colour. Some things that are still clear in my mind are the reddish orange hue of dawn breaking and dusk setting, the pitch-black darkness of the night being colorized by the grey moon, the feel of the cool breeze as it blows past your wet face and sweaty body, the merciless hot yellow light during the day and the freezing pale grey world of the night. Not having to feel these for a long time suddenly makes me feel detached from something that feels familiar - it has been replaced by a sense of strangeness and wierdness about it, an imbalance that must somehow be corrected.

Additionally, it happened today that things didn’t turn out normally as well. My friend’s brother was keeping his elder brother’s MSN session open so I could send him a photo (which is what you don’t see everyday), and a Malaysian (whom I have an inkling of the notion that he is a “colleague” - no, wait, its more like “coursemate” for the job that both of us signed up with HP for) just added me to his MSN list just because we happen to be in the same group of people who are going for an on-the-job training course tomorrow. Sheesh. Can’t today be an uneventful but joyous and normal day for me?

Much has changed in the HKSS website since I last accessed it…more than a year ago? Heh. Last time when I was a student, sec 2 streaming was conducted the pen & paper way. The HKSS website was partially defunct and amateurish. Classroom computers and wireless networks? Never existed. Blogs? Unheard of. (I have this growing suspicion right now that the blogs here are actually for English lessons. I think I was conned into signing up for a blog here.) The colours that the school was painted in were less bold and “colourful” compared to now (but I still prefer the old paint scheme). Speech Days used to be a long ceremony that involved the various uniformed groups on parade in the Quadrangle (or was it “quadrangle”?) and performing societies putting up their best show in the school hall and the whole event lasted from the evening all the way untill 10 or 11pm.

And the IT system in the school (bare with me here, as I specialize in this field). Computer labs were once like refrigerators. I made “The BFG Computer Game” with software that was 3 years old when I was in secondary 1 (and I still shudder at the thought of that simple computer game I made. Was it the cheesy sound effects and graphics, or was it because I knew how to do it at a tender age of 13? I don’t know) The lab was once ruled by technicians who were “overqualified” for their job - I can still remember one of them programming his own “anti-IRC software” (ah, IRC. Brings back many memories) program that was installed on all the computers in the lab. MIDI, and then some time later, MP3 was the best “development” in “audio technology” at that time (this was back in late 1998, unlike now when MP3 is so popular and MIDI had recently crossed over to the mobile phone about 2 to 3 years back). Then came the LEGO Mindstorms Robotics fad that many schools were interested in. Days spent in the Students’ Recreation Centre and computer labs just trying to get a robot moving! Done your PowerPoint presentation at home? Too big to fit onto a single floppy disk? Span it over 2, 3, or more floppies (Which my friends did)! I can still remember lugging an external proprietary laser-magneto based 120MB floppy disk drive to school (which in the end, got killed off by the Zip drive, and later, delt the finishing blow with the advent of the CD writers), which proved to be handy in presenting large presentations in class. While most students (in other schools anyway. Beyond this sentence is pure hypothesis because I think the Internet was the trend at that time) who were interested in computing specialized in the growing field of webpage designing and building, I concentrated on a more creative and visual aspect - video editing. The first video I did was for a simple English project that involved a presentation of our experience in the annual sec 3 camp. At first, I didn’t know how to use it, besides knowing that the software is used for video editing, and I was “playing” around with the software, until at last, I whacked out a music video to the beat of the Backstreet Boys (please don’t ask what song I chose). Since then, I’ve produced a few video clips for the school (which I think the school is still using), and with each “project” I completed, I gained more experience in producing video clips. Not bad for a kid who’s 16 and has done a few projects for his school. There were times of setback (argh, Charity Night 2000), yes, but thankfully the teachers stepped in to help me get over the emotional impact of failing to present the result (To this day, I have not properly said “thank you” to them, so I might as well say it now. Thank you, Ms Ling and Mrs Wee for giving me the guidance and support when I needed them most, especially for a 16 year old kid who’s going through alot of stress due to the O-levels then) . This cumulated into the last video clip I did for the school before I graduated - the Teacher’s Day video. I still regard this video clip as the pinnacle of my works done in secondary school - the prefect balance between creativity and requirements. After the year 2000, schools (and the public, in general) began to notice that their home computers can process video (partially due to the advancement in camcorder technology that allowed it to be connected to a computer via the Firewire cable), and thus begins the foray into video production…well, for schools anyway.

Times have changed since then - some good and others bad - in the school. People change. The environment changes. Students change. All in the blink of an eye (well, at least to ME). Old canteen tables and wooden chairs are replaced by plastic-topped ones. Easier to clean and maintain, and won’t give way so easily. The website evolved from a simple “me too!” site into a complex one, and many more that I have not noticed since I graduated from HKSS. New uniform colours as well (I still prefer the old green ones) Once in a while, I get jolted back into my teenage years when Jurongville secondary mentions my school in their daily morning announcements when I wake up in the morning on my off and sick days. At first, I was pleasantly surprised when they announced that they had won a few awards in the second W4 Video Awards, and then I thought, “Wait a minute, I sort of “started” this, how come I wasn’t invited as a guest?”. It’s strange how the world works these days, but you’ll just have to accept it and move on.

I have a tanline. No, I didn’t go swim, but I am in the parade for the upcoming RSAF Day. My beret has made a section of my forehead whiter than my entire face. Had 3 days of rehearsal this week, and I think if I continue like this, I’m gonna get sunburnt. Well, at least there are funny moments at the parade:

1) The crazy bugger who was in the present arms pose (hormat senja-ta) and my PS was checking everyone’s pose, when his phone rang. A warrant officer was standing just 2m away from him and he didn’t hear it, but my PS heard it and came over near his spot. She (yes, my PS is a female) tried to listen for the ringtone and locate the guy who had his phone in the pocket in the parade square, but she eventually gave up. When she turned away to focus on other guys, this fellow, in front of the people in the shade with other senior ranking officers vetting the parade, took out his phone, turned it off and then resumed the present arms pose. Strangely no one complained about him afterwards when the rehearsal was over.

2) The driver who was supposed to drive CAF to the parade square, after the GOH doormen opened the car doors and closed it, sounded a very cute and short horn before driving off.

I went to the 2Exits musical this afternoon that was organised by my friend’s church. A pretty good show, especially the parody of the “I Love You Baby” song - “I Love You Money”. The food was also good (if you exclude the bread and the grey “ang ku kueh”). Sigh. Today, again, I am forced into rethinking about sins, choices, destiny, the very existence of myself, God and Jesus. (The last time I did this, I couldn’t sleep for 3 hours. Maybe I’ll try this thinking method when I go outfield and manning sentry post at 0300 hours) This is one big headache for me. As much as I try to be sensitive to my Christian friend, I can’t help but keep finding excuses and neutral-ground reasons for her (my friend). During the prayer session, I asked God why in the world am I doing there, and what should I do now, because I had sworn not to interfere and keep a distance from her fellowship due to the fact that I do not want misunderstandings and complications to arise if I joined her fellowship on a long-term basis. Again, a simple trip to enjoy musical turned out into a headache-inducing and depressing one. Sigh. Can’t the world be much simpler?

Final entry of the day - saw Gundam Seed Destiny HGIF 2 at Suntec Toy Room. Argh. Time to spend money again.

GRADUATED FROM NGEE ANN POLY! Haha…OK, had to make this quick post before I get back on board the boat to Tekong. Took quite a few pictures with friends and lecturers, enjoyed the food and atmosphere as well. Saw quite a few people in green - I suppose we’re the earliest batch to enter military service. Ah well, if you get in fast, you get out fast.

Finally! Back to civilization for about 30 hours or so. I’m starting to get a tan, muscles are growing and I generally feel fitter. Whoo!

Now that I’ve entered NS, I am finally beginning to realize the importance of NS. Yeah, some of you may complain that NS is a pain, SAF = “Serve and F*** off” (no offence to the SAF - and yes, this is one of the bad things one learns in the SAF), but once you book out, you realize that without us, will our country turn into ruin? National threats abound, terrorists streaking about in the night and day, etc. You see that man over there holding his baby? What makes him so happy and safe enough for him to bring his baby on the train? What about that lady who is crossing the road? She crosses without fear of being knocked down or shot. Do you ever wonder why?

Anyway, I’m just glad I did my part in protecting innocent lives. Though it has been a tiring 2 weeks, overall it was quite enjoyable. Sleep is very important! Little/no sleep = tiring days!

10 more hours remain before I step foot on Tekong. Seems that I have everything packed, I guess. Sadly, I don’t have a keepsake to remember and hope on, like Aragorn has his Evenstar. Everyone seems to be predicting either that I’m going to have a hell lot of time suffering or that NS sucks. LOL! I am, however, mentally prepared - as I’ve said, expect the unexpected.

Well, then, I’m off to bed. I’m going to be uncontactable for a while, any messages (text or voice) for me can be left on my mobile number, though I won’t get to see them until after two weeks’ time, ’cause I’m not bringing my HP there.